Going Home

Part 8

Holding him Grace waited until Josh broke the embrace. Then as he pulled back she gave him a quick kiss before speaking. “Josh I can’t tell you what to do that’s got to come from you but I’ll support you no matter what you decide. Okay?”

But Josh couldn’t think let alone make a decision and it was driving him crazy. So rubbing his hands over his head in frustration he replied with discernable anger “but that’s the problem I don’t know what to do.”

Grace was silent for a minute. Clearly Josh’s emotions were raw and she didn’t want to make things worse but if she was going to help him she needed more information. So with caution, she asked “can you tell me what happened with your parents?”

Josh flicked his gaze around and looked at her, his face an angry mask. He knew he had to talk about this but knowing it didn’t make it any easier to do. However his anger was not directed at Grace and seeing the concern in her face it subsided somewhat. Then looking away and leaning back on the couch again he sighed and said “nothing happened.”

Grace just looked at him waiting for more. But when it became clear he wasn’t going to continue she said in a quiet voice “come on Josh something must have happened.”

Josh shook his head and said in a flat voice “no, after the accident they didn’t speak. Not to me, not to each other, or not that I saw. Not to anyone. After a while the silence was worse than anything they could have said.” Josh stopped and took a deep breath, fighting to get himself under control before continuing. Remembering those horrible silent months before he left home, hurt more than he could say.

Watching him closely Grace saw the pain in Josh’s face and reaching out to hold his hand, she gave it a squeeze.

Turning his head to look at her for a minute Josh continued. “They couldn’t even look at me and when I tried to speak to them, they just shut me down. I knew they blamed me, hell I blamed me. It was my fault and none of us could live with what I’d done, so I left.”