Rescue Me

Part 9

Taken aback by her sudden flare of anger, Jesse watched her walk away, flinching, as even from his position on the footpath, he heard her front door slam shut. Seeing a light come on inside, he turned back the way they had come, heading for home.

 As he walked along Jesse’s thoughts surrounded the woman he’s just left. He knew her anger was probably reaction to what had happened as much as anything and he didn’t hold it against her. He liked her. She seemed independent and ambitious, not to mention that she was gorgeous. It was a combination that has attracted him before. But he hadn’t been looking to like someone for a long time. In fact he had been consciously avoided meeting anyone who may fit that category. Frowning, angry as he realised that Kayla had got under his guard before he could stop her, he forced his mind to focus elsewhere, and continued his journey home.

But Kayla’s image continued to linger throughout the next day and late that night as Jesse walked along the line of shops on his way home, he couldn’t help but wonder what he would feel if he saw her again. Like the night before, there was no one about and yet he could see the lights were still on in the pharmacy. Shaking his head, he smiled wryly, deciding Kayla either had guts or she was just plain stubborn. He walked into the shop.

Going Home

Part 16

Margaret Joshua watched as a tall fit looking man strode towards her holding the hand of a pretty blonde woman. Even though she’d know her son anywhere and thought she was prepared for the changes that fourteen years would have brought, she was surprised and impressed at the man he had become. But she was incredibly nervous and the stern expression on her son’s face was not giving her any reassurance. But he was there and that was more than she had expected when she picked up the phone to call him.

Grace looked at Josh’s mother, trying to find any resemblance to Josh. But apart from her eyes which were the same colour as Josh’s it seemed to Grace little of his mother’s genes were evident in Josh. Grace smiled warmly at her when their eyes meet and watched the wary expression that crossed her face as she studied Josh.

Stopping in front of his mother Josh studied her face and waited for her to speak. He was here but he wasn’t going to make it easy for her. He’d been angry too long.

As her son stared down at her, Margaret Joshua gathered her courage to speak. “Brendan”

But Josh frowned and said is a stern tone “no.”

Margaret frowned too not sure what he meant.

Grace who was watching this exchange suddenly saw another similarity between mother and son.

Josh wanted to get this straight right from the start he was not going to sit there and be called by a name that was completely irrelevant to who he was now. “It’s Josh now. I haven’t been Brendan since coming to the city.”

Margaret was silent for a minute as she processed this. Not sure what to make of it, but also not wanting to get off to a bad start, she nodded “okay, Josh. I’ll try to remember that.”

Josh then turned to look at Grace. He wasn’t sure what to call his mother so he just avoided it as he introduced them. “This is Grace. Grace, Margaret Joshua?”

Grace held out her hand and with a smile said “nice to meet you Margaret.”

Margaret was relieved at the warm greeting from the woman at her son’s side and taking her hand replied “lovely to meet you Grace.” Then turning and gesturing towards some chairs asked “can we sit down and talk?”

Josh nodded and they made their way over to the comfortable lounge chairs set around a low table.

Josh sat down, and waited for his mother to speak. She wanted to see him, so he felt it was up to her to start this off.

Margaret however was unsure how to start. “You look well.”

Josh remained silent. He was not here for small talk.

Sensing this, Margaret squared her shoulders and got to the point. “It’s about your father.”

Rescue Me

Part 8

After a minute Kayla said “can I ask you a question?”

“Okay.”

Looking over at him she asked “why did you tell that guy I was your girlfriend?”

Jesse smiled. He’d wondered if she was going to question that. At the time he wasn’t even sure she’d heard it. “I didn’t want him to just tell me to just get what I wanted and leave which he might have done if I’d pretended to just be a customer. I needed an excuse to hang around, sorry if it made you uncomfortable.”

Kayla shook her head and looked away “I just wondered that’s all.” After a minute she said “it didn’t make me uncomfortable.”

Looking at her averted face for a minute Jesse said in a serious tone “my turn to ask a question. How come you work alone so late at night? Surely you can make your boss understand it’s not safe?”

She stopped and squared her shoulders as she turned to face him. Her voice sharp she said, “believe it or not, I’m the boss and while I was aware of the risks before, you can rest assured they have now been well and truly brought home to me now. However as I can’t afford to have anyone else rostered on that late, and I need to stay open to keep my business going, I don’t have a bloody choice about it.” Then spinning around, she strode up her drive way.

Going Home

Part 15

Josh and Grace walked into the hotel foyer where they were to meet Josh’s mother. Neither of them had said much since leaving home. Josh seemed lost in his thoughts and Grace was loath to disturb him. But as they got close to what would be a difficult meeting Grace squeezed Josh’s hand to give him a tangible reminder of her support. Josh looked down at her. Then leaning down he gave her a quick kiss and as he lifted his head he winked at her and she smiled realising he was ready now for anything.

Turning his attention back to the people in the foyer Josh looked for his mother. He wasn’t sure he would know her straight away as it had been over fourteen years. But as soon as the woman stood and moved towards them Josh recognised her. She looked older but still very familiar. Glancing quickly at Grace, Josh moved towards her.

Rescue Me

Part 7

Fifteen minutes later, after Kayla had given her statement, Jesse saw the officers out. As he walked back in the door, he noticed she didn’t look up. She looked like she was concentrating hard, but her movements were laboured, like she was forcing herself to move. Eventually she moved into a room at the back of the shop and after a few minutes the shop was plunged into darkness. She reappeared with her bag and Jesse followed her out. She locked the doors and he helped her secure the shutters.

 She muttered “thanks” as she turned the key in the lock. 

Watching her slow movements Jesse could see she was tired. He knew how much the sort of stress she was under could wear a person out. Worried, he asked “you sure you’re right to walk home?”

“Yes, I’ll be fine as long as we keep moving” she said and as they began the journey she added with a hint of a smile “I promise to wait until after you leave to fall in a heap.”

He smiled at the first hint of humour she had displayed, “just make sure you land some place soft.”

Kayla smiled properly this time “don’t worry I intend too.”

“Is there going to be anyone home when you get there?” He hoped she’d have someone to talk to so she could process what happened.

“No, there is never anyone home, unless I’m there” she said, her voice flat, her little glimmer of levity gone.

“Is there someone you can call?”  

“No” she replied again with a sigh “the minute I tell anyone what happened, I’ll get an ‘I told you so’ lecture. I can do without that tonight.”

“Fair enough” he muttered, thoughtful. He wondered who she was worried would give her a lecture. Boyfriend? Family? Either or both were possible.

“I’ll be fine Jesse really, but thanks.”

He nodded. He couldn’t push it any further. It was up to her after all.

Random Act

Something about the woman walking a couple of metres ahead of her along the corridor got Claire’s attention. Few other people moved about in this part of the building as the majority of the offices were still to be occupied. Generally she could walk from her office to the cafe at the other end of the building, without meeting a soul. She wondered if that alone was what drew her focus. But a few minutes later she realised it wasn’t. After watching the woman turn to the right into an adjacent corridor, what surprised Claire was that it came as no great shock when she came abreast of the corridor, and saw the woman collapsed in a heap on the ground. 

She rushed to the woman’s side and knelt next to her “are you okay?” she asked a little ridiculously as it was clear the woman wasn’t okay.

The woman didn’t respond. Claire turned her over and saw her eyes were closed. Putting her bag down she pulled out her phone to call for help. But before she could dial the woman’s eyes snapped open and zoned in on her. The woman’s brown eyes were hard and focused and Claire realised with dismay that she didn’t look dazed or confused as you would expect someone who had just passed out to be.

The woman snatched her phone out of her hand “I don’t think we need to call anybody.”
She then jumped off the floor with surprising dexterity and drew a knife out of her sleeve, “give me your wallet.”

Claire didn’t make a sound as she fished in her bag and handed over her wallet, her eyes glued to the knife.

The woman took her wallet and emptied the contents into the pockets of the jacket she was wearing before tossing it aside. Her eyes moved back to Claire “and the jewellery.”

Claire took off her wedding and engagement rings, the watch her mother had given her for her birthday and the gold necklace that had been a surprise gift from her husband. She handed them to the woman.

“Empty your bag onto the floor” the woman ordered, her eyes flicking around, checking there was no one coming.

Claire emptied her bag. She didn’t ask questions and she didn’t move except to fulfil instructions. Her heart was racing and she could feel sweat running down between her shoulder blades, but she did her best to remain calm. She knew her best chance of getting out of this in one piece was doing everything that was asked of her without argument. Nothing was worth risking injury or worse. She could replace things.

The woman sifted through the contents on the floor with rough movements. She found nothing of interest. Then with a last look each way down the corridor she squatted down in front of Claire and with a smile said “you made this really easy. I wish they were all like you.” She then leant forward like she was going to whisper something to her and her smile widening, she moved back, rose to her feet and sprinted down the corridor. 

Claire let out a breath as the woman moved out of sight. It was over.  But as she tried to take in enough air to fill her lungs again she felt a searing pain in her chest. She became aware of something wet on her hand. It was lying in her lap. Puzzled she looked down and watched with surprise as blood gushed out of her chest. Lifting her head again, Claire stared down the corridor, in the direction the woman had fled, and slowly, like someone using a dimmer switch, everything faded away.

Rescue Me

Part 6

Kayla continuing to examine his face for a minute then releasing her breath on a sigh she turned away.  Watching her, Jesse asked “you ready to go back in? It shouldn’t take too long and then one of them will give you a lift home.”

Surprising him, she shook her head “no it’s fine, I only live a couple of minutes away, I’ll walk.”

Jesse didn’t like that “I don’t think that’s a good idea. After what happened, I’d be happier if someone made sure you got home alright.”

“But I have to lock up. I can’t keep these officers here all that time, they need to get back to work.”

Frowning and thinking for a minute, Jesse made a suggestion “I don’t live far from here either and I’m finished for the day, I can wait while you lock up and then walk you home.”

“I can’t ask you to do that. I’m sure you want to get home.”

Thinking about his empty apartment waiting for him he gave a shrug “it’s no problem and you didn’t ask, I offered.”

Silent for a minute, she shivered and relented “okay, if you’re sure, that would be good.”

“No worries” Jesse assured her with another shrug then standing he asked “ready?”

Nodding Kayla got to her feet “thanks Jesse.”

“Sure thing” he replied and stepped back to let her lead the way back into the shop.

Rescue Me

Part 5

Within a few seconds Jesse could hear voices outside and looking up, watched as two police officers walked into the shop.

“You Mansfield?” one asked.

“Yep, my Id’s in my back pocket. Can you take this guy?”

As the officers cuffed the offender Jesse pulled out his wallet. Satisfied, one of the officers walked the man out to the car while the other asked for an account of what happened. Telling them what he knew Jesse then said “you’ll need to speak to the woman who works here for the rest.”

“Yes, we’ll get her statement as well.”

“She was pretty shaken up. Let me have a word with her first.”

Nodding, the officer continued to enter details into his note book.

Stepping out onto the pavement Jesse looked around for Kayla and spotted her sitting on a bench a few meters away. Her elbows on her thighs, she had her head in her hands. Before tonight he’d never got a close up look at her, but he had noticed that she always seemed to wear her brown hair tied back and looped up off her neck and he could see that tonight was no exception. What he hadn’t fully realised though, was just how attractive she was, with big blue eyes and fair skin.

Approaching her he said “hey.”

She jumped on hearing his voice and Jesse saw the fear leap into her eyes as she spun around to look at him. He held his hands up in front of him, “it’s okay, just me, Jesse.” He watched as the trepidation ebbed away again.

She looked away and apologised “sorry.”

“Forget it” he replied unconcerned “it’s a natural reaction” and taking a seat beside her he added “the officers want to talk to you.”

She nodded “okay,” but she made no attempt to move, then turning to look at him again she stated “you’re a policeman.”

Glad to see she had obviously recovered enough to pick up on that, he smiled “yes I’m a cop.”

Rescue Me

Part 4

The woman just looked at him. Then her voice not much louder than a whisper she said “yes.” She cleared her throat, “yes I’m fine.”

Jesse nodded, “the cops should be here any second. Can you go out the front and tell them they are okay to enter?”

She nodded but didn’t move.

Realising shock was setting in, Jesse tried to reassure her, “my name’s Jesse, what’s yours?”

“Kayla” she answered almost automatically, her eyes drifting off to stare vacantly across the room.

“Kayla, look at me” he ordered and when he saw her eyes focus on his again he said “you’re safe now, it’s all over, okay?”

A shudder passed through her. She nodded “okay.”

“Good, now you go outside and wait for the police, yeah?”

He watched her nod again then rub her hands over her face as she slowly stepped around the counter and walked outside.

Relieved, Jesse focused back on the guy beneath him and frowned as he started up another tirade. Shoving his knee into the guys back he said “for god sake, shut the hell up.”

Rescue Me

Part 3

 Jesse stopped. He was within an arm’s reach of her now but so was the knife. He tried to placate the man “okay I’m not moving, what do you want?”

“Stuff all from you” and moving the knife closer to the woman he said “I want her to open the safe.”

“Okay, how about she goes to get what you want and I’ll stay here with you?” Jesse replied, putting his arm out and moving the woman back a little as he spoke, as if he was directing her to go.

“No way, she’ll call the cops.”

“Not if I’m here with you she won’t” Jesse assured him, hoping to god the cops that were on their way, approached without sirens.

“Nup I’m going with her to make sure she cleans it out” he said, his eyes fixed on the woman as he took a step to the side in order to move behind the counter. However the step took the woman out of his reach and with his focus now back on her, it was the opening Jesse needed. Lunging forward he put the guy in a headlock whilst bringing his arm down hard on the counter, dislodging the knife. As the man cried out in either protest or pain, the knife bounced on the shiny surface before falling to the ground on the other side.

Now he was unarmed Jesse wasted no time kicking his legs out from under him, propelling him to the floor so he was lying on his stomach. Kneeling on his back, he kept him pinned down with his own body weight.

As a stream of profanity spewed from the man’s mouth, Jesse pulled his arms high up behind his back, “yeah unless you want me to break your arm, shut up mate.”

Finally able to look over at the woman as the guy stopped yelling, Jesse saw she hadn’t moved. Studying her pale face as he withstood the man’s struggles to break free, he asked “you okay?”

Going Home

Part 14

The next morning Josh was ready to go and was pacing impatiently in the living room waiting for Grace. He was suddenly filled with doubt about the whole situation and he found he didn’t enjoy the sensation so it was making him short-tempered. Eventually he’d had enough and called out “come on Grace, what’s taking so long?”

Thirty seconds later Grace walked into the room ready to leave. She knew his impatience stemmed from his anxiety about the immanent meeting with his mother so she didn’t argue. “Okay Josh I’m ready, let’s go.”

“Finally” Josh sighed angrily.

Not wanting to inflame the situation Grace said nothing and walked to the front door.

But now that the time had come to go Josh couldn’t move. This was something he never thought would happen and now it was he wasn’t sure he could handle it. Thinking back to when he first left home hurt incredibly, all the months he’d hoped they’d make contact and they didn’t. After a while he learnt not to hope, he learnt the hard way if he had no expectations then he wouldn’t be disappointed. But what if this renewed connection wasn’t what he expected or wanted? What if he was disappointed again? Could he cope with that?

As Grace reached the front door she realised Josh hasn’t followed and retracing her steps back to the living room door she saw he hadn’t moved. Looking at him she could tell his focus was not in the room and asked “you okay?”

Hearing Grace’s voice brought Josh back to the present and as his eyes focused on her face, he pulled himself together. He realised as long as he had her, he could face anything.  He nodded “yeah let’s get this over with.” Then striding over to her, he grabbed her hand and lead her to the door.

Rescue Me

Part 2

“Bloody hell.” Jesse pulled out his phone and dialled triple zero. Giving his name and the address of the shop along with a brief description of what was occurring Jesse hung up. But even after making the call he didn’t feel any better about the situation. He knew help would be at least a couple of minutes arriving and given that whatever the guy was on was likely to make him unpredictable, that may be too long. He could hear the woman trying to reason with the guy now, her voice tremulous as the man just continued to get more and more agitated. “Bloody hell, why do people do that?” he asked himself angrily and not for the first time. “Just give him what he wants for Christ sake.” Listening for another second he decided he couldn’t wait any more. He couldn’t leave her in there by herself any longer, so hurriedly devising a plan of action, he stepped back into the middle of the footpath.

Jesse strode past the window, and without pause, entered the shop. Moving fast he managed to nearly reach the counter before the man span around to confront him. Jesse put his hands up in front of him and feigned surprise as the blade of the knife, now pointed at him, glinted in the bright overhead lights. “Whoa mate, I don’t want any trouble. I’m just here to pick up my girl friend.”

Jesse could hear the woman’s accelerated breathing. He knew she was frightened but he couldn’t take his eyes off the guy to reassure her.

“Yeah well your girlfriend isn’t going to be much to look at if she doesn’t do what I say” the man sneered.

“Okay, just relax.” Jesse slowly moved closer to the woman as he spoke. He’d like to put himself between her and the knife, but he didn’t want to agitate the guy further, so just moved when he could.

“Stop bloody moving” the man yelled.

Rescue Me

This is the first part of a medium length story.

It had been a long day for Jesse and his stop at the pub hadn’t made it any shorter, but he’d needed to relax and unwind before trying to sleep. Some days a run worked to clear his head but on other days no distraction had an impact and this was one of those days. Shrugging his shoulders as if shifting a weight he was carrying, he pushed his hands into the pockets of his jeans and glared out at the night.

The street was deserted and Jesse was two blocks from home when he passed by his local shopping strip.  At this hour most of the shops were locked up for the night. However he could see by the pool of light spilling out the open door onto the pavement, that the pharmacy was, as usual, still open. He had seen the woman who worked there, numerous times on his way home. Frowning he wondered yet again, how she could work so late on her own.  

Passing the bank situated next to the pharmacy Jesse was surprised to hear raised voices. The woman in the pharmacy was speaking to someone in the shop. Her voice was laced with fear, “okay, please just tell me what you want?”

“Open the safe.”

“Crap” Jesse breathed as he came to an abrupt stop. He moved closer to the glass shop front. Flattening himself against the wall of the bank he had a quick look through the adjoining window. The brief glimpse he got, told him everything he needed to know. He could see the woman, standing behind the counter and on the other side, a skinny guy holding a knife. The guy looked dirty and dishevelled and from his agitated movements, Jesse knew his choice of a pharmacy to hold up, probably wasn’t a random pick.

Traffic Jam

Part 2

To Amy it seemed like everything was happening in slow motion as she waited for the impact. She knew it would come because she had nowhere to go even if she had time to move. Her car was surrounded by other cars and if she got out she may have been worse off without the protection of her vehicle. In a split second she accepted the inevitable and taking a deep breath, braced herself. Closing her eyes, she prayed, something she hadn’t done since she was a kid, as the deafening sound of grinding metal closed in on her. She didn’t look. Keeping her eyes shut, she felt a peace settle within her just before everything went black.

Going Home

Part 13

As they were having dinner the next night Grace looked at Josh. They hadn’t spoken about the meeting since the phone call. Grace wanted to give Josh some breathing space so he wasn’t consumed by it and Josh seemed happy to let the subject rest for a while. But needing to check he was prepared she asked “are you ready for tomorrow?

Josh looked at her, then away “I guess so. I just wish I knew why she needed to see me all of a sudden.”

Sensing Josh was in a more relaxed frame of mind than he had been in since this started Grace chose her words with care as she asked a question she has been considering for some time “when you were talking to her, did she mention your father?”

Josh turned his head again to look at her with a frown. He knew that there was something behind that question. “No why?”

Grace had been speculating ever since his mother called, about whether his father was part of this or maybe even the cause of it. Josh hadn’t said anything about him and she was not sure if he even realised the omission. So still choosing her words with care she said “I just wondered, you haven’t mentioned him.”

Josh continued to look at her and realised she was right. His thoughts had been so confused since this started he hadn’t even considered how or if his father was involved. He just assumed the renewed contact involved both of them.

Watching the expression on Josh’s face, Grace was worried that maybe she shouldn’t have said anything and she reached out and put her hand on his arm “sorry Josh I didn’t mean to make it more difficult for you. I just wanted to make sure you were prepared for what ever happened tomorrow.”

Looking at her worried expression Josh pushed aside all thoughts of tomorrow. Until he saw his mother he had no way of knowing anything and all the thinking in the world wouldn’t change that. But there was something he could do now. Moving his chair back from the table Josh grabbed Grace’s hand and pulling her up out of her seat, he guiding her around the corner of the table and sat her on his lap. Sliding one hand into her hair and gently holding her head, he pulled her slowly towards him. Just before his lips met hers he looked at her and said “difficult is the last thing you have made it Grace. I couldn’t do this without you, so thank you” and as he finished speaking he leant forward and kissed her with an intensity born of the emotion of the last couple of days.  

Then lifting his head a few minutes later Josh stood with Grace still in his arms and carried her to bed to show her just how grateful he was.

Traffic Jam

Amy blew out her breath with annoyance as traffic once again came to a standstill. She loved her job but hated driving home in peak hour traffic. It frustrated her no end that it took forty minutes to cover the same ground it would take twenty minutes to cover at any other time. Watching the stream of tail lights laid out in front of her in the dim twilight, she knew she wouldn’t be going anywhere for a while and turned her head to look out the side window.

Lost in her thoughts, Amy was jolted back to the present on hearing the ominous sound of tyres screeching, followed by a loud metal on metal crunch as a horn started blaring. Her head spinning around she searched the other side of the road for the source of the noise, hoping the accident wasn’t too bad and that nobody was hurt. But she couldn’t see anything. Then as her gaze flicked up to the rear view mirror her eyes widened in horror as she watched the cars behind her crumple and twist in turn as each one was rammed into the next.

Going Home

Part 12

As they are sitting in the living room later that afternoon Josh picked up his phone and turned to look at Grace.

Knowing what he intended to do she looked at his serious expression and asked “sure you’re ready?”

Josh nodded “ready as I’ll ever be.”

She rose to leave the room “I’ll just give you some space.”

But before she could move away Josh grabbed her hand and without looking at her said “stay.”

Squeezing his hand Grace sat back down “okay.”

Without releasing her hand Josh called the number he never thought he’d use again. Then putting the phone to his ear to wait for the connection he looked at Grace.

Grace watched as Josh steeled himself to face his demons. Involuntarily he squeezed her hand as she heard the person at the other end give a greeting. Then she listened as Josh dispensed with a greeting and responded simply “it’s Brendan.” It sounded odd to Grace hearing Josh refer to himself in that way. In all the time she had known him he’d never used that name except when introducing himself officially, and nobody has ever called him that. But bringing her attention back to the room she heard the person at the other end speaking again.

Josh listened as his mother thanked him for calling back and said she needed to see him. Not willing to be particularly accommodating, he agreed in a curt voice. She then told him she’d be in town over the week end and asked if they could meet. Brusque, he organised a meeting place and time and hung up without saying goodbye.

As conversations go, Grace thought, it wasn’t much, but it was a start.

Looking over at her as he put his phone down Josh said “two days and we’ll know.”

Grace looked at his bleak expression “you okay?”

Nodding he reached out and pulled her into his arms loving the feeling of belonging she gave him. Being with Grace was the only time he had felt that since he left home and taking a deep breath he replied “yeah, I’m good.”

Parenthood

I’ve often heard the question asked; why isn’t there an instruction manual when you take on the job of parent? After spending my Sunday afternoon in the emergency department of the local hospital, due to a football injury, waiting to see the triage nurse, waiting to see the admin officer, waiting to see the doctor, waiting to go to x-ray, waiting to come back from x-ray, and then waiting to be discharged, I have to wonder if it is in part due to the fact that no one would ever do it if they knew what they were in for.

As a parent you seem to spend your life bouncing from one problem to another, putting out one fire, only to see another one start up somewhere else and that’s when things are good. More often, you have to fight two or three simultaneously, not an easy feat when you only have one pair of hands. Not to mention you are flying blind into the bargain. You never know whether the decisions you make are the right ones, until it is too late to undo them and by then other decisions that wouldn’t wait, have further complicated matters. I ask you, who in their right mind would agree to that, if they knew about it ahead of time? 

But like anything there is a flip side to this position, another way to look at it. Maybe there is no instruction manual because it would diminish the joy by revealing the adventure. Who needs extreme sports to provide, danger and excitement when you have kids?  Parenthood is there greatest thrill ride there is, with more ups and downs than a rollercoaster and a surprise around every corner.

 So maybe, after all we are better off without guidance, not only because for some it would stop the journey before it started, but also because it may reduce the exhilaration and diminish the experience leading to the worst of all possible situations, boredom.

Going Home

Part 11

The next morning Grace purposely avoided the subject of Josh’s parents, leaving it up to him to bring the subject up when he was ready. During breakfast they talk about other things and decide as they have the day off, to go for a run. Getting ready to head out Grace was wondering about what was going on in Josh’s head. He seems less troubled today so she hoped that maybe he’d come to a decision. But sticking with her earlier resolve not to bring it up she didn’t ask him.

Josh had woken to a better day. Sleep had eased some of the tension he was feeling and better still, being able to think clearly had enabled him to come to a decision on what to do about his parents. Even though he knew the hard part was still to come, just eliminating the indecision felt like an enormous relief. And after the turmoil of yesterday the relief felt so good that he didn’t want to do anything to destroy it. As a consequence he didn’t want to talk about it yet and he was grateful Grace didn’t ask.

As they jog along their usual route next to the river Grace glanced up at Josh. He looked serious and wanting to give him something else to think about she said “race you to the bridge” and took off before Josh could even take in what she had said.

Sighing and smiling as she was rapidly moving away from him Josh moved into top gear and chased after her.

Just before Grace reached the bridge she felt Joshs arms go around her and the next thing she knew, she was lying on the grass with Josh on top of her. Smiling up at him she teased “you must be getting slower, I nearly made it this time.”

Josh looked down at her with a stern expression and reprimanded “the only reason you nearly made it this time is that you don’t play fair.”

Grace laughed “well I need some advantage. Your legs are longer than mine.”

Smiling down at her now Josh conceded “true” then looking at her intently he continued “but you know that kind of thing only lands you in trouble.

Feigning innocence Grace asked “oh, what sort of trouble?”

Josh’s smile widened “Grace you know exactly what sort of trouble” and leaning down he kissed her.

After a minute Josh reluctantly lifted his head and looked at her. Touching her face tenderly, his expression going somber and he admited “I’m going to ring them.”

Grace smiled, she was happy he was going to try and sort things out with his parents. To her this seemed the best way for Josh to put the past behind him and reaching up she pulled his head back to hers.

A few minutes later, Josh once again raised his head and grinned. God she knew how to drive him crazy. Quickly getting to his feet before he gave into temptation, he helped Grace up and looking at her warned “well after that you’d better hope you can out run me now, because if I catch you before we get home we’re both going to be in trouble. Laughing, Grace was glad to see a return of his sense of humour and setting off in the direction home, she made sure she kept out of arms reach on the way

Why are people so unkind?

Much of our daily life is spent amongst strangers in various social situations. But with any interaction with strangers comes the potential for incivility, including; rude, selfish, inconsiderate or inappropriate behaviour. And it seems that this type of behaviour is becoming more and more the norm. But why is this? A few years ago I conducted a research project on this subject and found that one of the most common responses to incivility today, was humour or indifference. I have to wonder if this tacit acceptance by many, is to blame for the increase in incidence in rude behaviour. 

But where does this blase attitude come from? Perhaps it is caused by the many shows that seem to celebrate the very worst displays of human conduct, such as Jackass. It appears there are no limits anymore to what can or should be done in the name of entertainment, the more disgusting or dangerous or just downright stupid the act, the better. As such it is perhaps no surprise to now see an ad for a children’s television show doing that same thing. To see such actions used as a comic relief for adults was bad enough but with this latest development in the children’s programming arena, we as a society seem to have reached an all time low. With this type of humour increasingly seen as normal by children is it any wonder that in society, incivility is no longer the exception but is more often the rule.  

Going Home

Part 10

Looking at Grace Josh was grateful she was there. As he hoped, she had helped make everything clearer and he knew she was right, he needed to make a decision but he was too tired to think about it anymore tonight. So pushing his hand into her hair and pulling her towards him he kissed her head and said “thanks.”

Grace smiled “that’s okay. So what are you going to do?”

 Moving back Josh groaned “I don’t know. I think I need to sleep on it. All I can think of at the moment is crawling into bed with you. I’ll worry about all this tomorrow.”

Grace smiled again glad he seemed calmer now. “Fair enough” she said. Then more than ready for bed herself she stood up and grabbed his hand to pull him to his feet “let’s go then, bed sounds good to me.” 

Standing up and looking down at her Josh ran a finger gently down her cheek and smiled for the first time since his phone had rung “you don’t need to ask me twice.”

Ten minutes later Grace slid into bed beside Josh. As she reached out and turned out the light Josh wrapped an arm around her waist and pulled her towards him, her back against his chest. Closing his eyes he kissed her hair and sighed, relaxing at last. She felt so good lying next to him. He knew her presence in his life was the only thing keeping him together and he needed her more than he ever had.

Feeling the strength of his hold on her Grace was aware that Josh was still troubled and hoped that tomorrow would bring some clarity. But for now she could offer him comfort and turning to face him she kissed him.

As Grace kissed him, Josh forgot everything that had happened and focused solely on the woman in his arms.

Going Home

Part 9

Grace felt terrible for Josh. What a thing to have to cope with at seventeen and on your own. A tear sliding down her face, she whispered “I’m sorry Josh. I can’t begin to imagine what that was like.”

Looking at her Josh lifted his hand and wiping away the tear with his thumb said flatly “I survived.”

Grace nodded. “Yes you did but now they’ve made contact how do you feel about it?”

His emotions still raging, Josh looked away and replied in an angry tone “God I don’t know Grace, I didn’t think they’d ever contact me.”

“Well maybe they need to speak to you for a reason?”

“So what, something happens and all of a sudden they want to talk to me. Is that a good enough reason for me to talk to them? They’ve never bothered to contact me before. Why should I speak to them now just because they’ve found they need something from me?”

Grace was surprised by the extreme bitterness in Josh’s voice. His feelings about what happened were obviously complex. She knew he felt guilty about the accident, but it was clear he was also angry at his parents for their reaction.

Keeping her voice even Grace tried to help him work through it. “Josh it may be that they wanted to contact you before but after a while didn’t know how. Maybe whatever is going on now gave them the push they needed to finally do it.”

Josh looked at her quickly then away and sounding scathingly said “yeah right.”

“Josh it happens, sometimes after a while it’s just too hard to reach out, sometimes it takes something exceptional to make you do it. Think about it could you have contacted them?”

Josh turned his head and looked at her in silence. He realised that maybe she had a point. He certainly couldn’t do it.

Seeing he was at least listening, Grace continued.

“Okay let me ask you this why did you put their number in your phone?”

Josh looked away and didn’t answer. He didn’t want to admit even to himself why he did that.

“Well maybe deep down you wanted them to contact you?”

Josh looked at her but still doesn’t speak.

Grace sighed “Well anyway now that they have, you have to decide what to do about it. It seems to me you have two choices, either you decide that you never want to have contact with them and ignore the call and change your number. Or choice number two, you try and work things out with them so you can all move on and you can come to terms with what happened. Josh this may be your last chance to do that. But it’s up to you.”

Thoughtful, Josh just continued to look at her.

Going Home

Part 8

Holding him Grace waited until Josh broke the embrace. Then as he pulled back she gave him a quick kiss before speaking. “Josh I can’t tell you what to do that’s got to come from you but I’ll support you no matter what you decide. Okay?”

But Josh couldn’t think let alone make a decision and it was driving him crazy. So rubbing his hands over his head in frustration he replied with discernable anger “but that’s the problem I don’t know what to do.”

Grace was silent for a minute. Clearly Josh’s emotions were raw and she didn’t want to make things worse but if she was going to help him she needed more information. So with caution, she asked “can you tell me what happened with your parents?”

Josh flicked his gaze around and looked at her, his face an angry mask. He knew he had to talk about this but knowing it didn’t make it any easier to do. However his anger was not directed at Grace and seeing the concern in her face it subsided somewhat. Then looking away and leaning back on the couch again he sighed and said “nothing happened.”

Grace just looked at him waiting for more. But when it became clear he wasn’t going to continue she said in a quiet voice “come on Josh something must have happened.”

Josh shook his head and said in a flat voice “no, after the accident they didn’t speak. Not to me, not to each other, or not that I saw. Not to anyone. After a while the silence was worse than anything they could have said.” Josh stopped and took a deep breath, fighting to get himself under control before continuing. Remembering those horrible silent months before he left home, hurt more than he could say.

Watching him closely Grace saw the pain in Josh’s face and reaching out to hold his hand, she gave it a squeeze.

Turning his head to look at her for a minute Josh continued. “They couldn’t even look at me and when I tried to speak to them, they just shut me down. I knew they blamed me, hell I blamed me. It was my fault and none of us could live with what I’d done, so I left.”

The School Yard

It was three fifteen in the afternoon. Mandy got out of her car and went through the usual checks on her appearance, making sure every detail was correct. As always at this time of the day, her nerves were getting the better of her. She hated going into the school yard to pick up her daughter and couldn't wait until she was old enough to meet her at the car.

Ever since that first morning, a month ago, when Ellie had started prep, Mandy had been aware of a huge divide in the parents milling around on the basket ball courts.There seemed to be two distinct groups of parents. Those that were blonde, thin, fashion conconscious and beautiful and those that weren't. As far as Mandy could tell, there wasn't any middle ground, you were either in one group or the other. Ellie being her only child, this was Mandy's first foray into a school since she was a student herself some twenty odd years earlier. Naturally as a parent her perspective was entirely different now, but she couldn't help feeling some of those same emotions she'd experienced back then as she looked around those gathered to see their child off on the beginning of their school journey.

Mandy had never been part of the popular group at school and it had always made her feel like she wasn't good enough. Leaving the school environment she had nearly forgotten those days. In her working life she was judged on her efficiency and competence, rather than her appearance and that's the way she liked it.


Pushing her short dark hair behind her ear she spotted a mother of a girl in Ellies class that she had spoken to briefly a few days ago. Mandy knew from Ellie she had three children, with the one just starting school, her last. Deciding not to stand by herself for once she moved towards the other mother.


"Hi" Mandy said in a quiet voice as she stopped next to the other woman, facing the stairs where the preps would come down to meet their parents.
The woman turned her head and smiled "hi, it's Mandy isn't it? Ellie's mum."
Mandy smiled, pleased with the welcome, "yes. Sorry I don't know your name, but I feel like I do know your daughter Brie, Ellie talks about her all the time."
The woman laughed "same here, all we hear about is Ellie. I'm Ronnie."

"So when do we get to just wait in the car?" Mandy asked with a smile, but nore than a little serious.
"Had enough of the performance already?" Ronnie asked with a raised eyebrow.
Tilting her head, not sure what Ronnie was referring to, Mandy looked at her with a question in her eyes.
Ronnie grinned and gestured with her head at the group of blond women, all either in tight fitting sports wear or wearing short dresses or expensive jeans and high heels, standing on the other side of the court "the perfect show" she said.
Surprised, Mandy was silent for a minute, then a slow smile spread across her face. "Pretty much" she admitted.
Ronnie laughed "I totally understand, trust me. It's the same every year. Just when I think it will be different with this child, that the parents will be different, a new crop of them appears."
"I thought it was just me" Mandy whispered "that I was seeing something that wasn't there."
"No" Ronnie said still smiling "it's there alright. They are nice enough really, it's just that they have a tendency to make us mere mortals feel rather inadequate."

Mandy nodded and looking back over her shoulder at the group of women, she realised that even though she had changed from child to parent not much else about school had.

Going Home

Part 7

Grace didn’t know what she had expected Josh to say, but whatever it was, it wasn’t that. She was shocked into silence. She knew Josh hadn’t had contact with his family since he left home after the accident that killed his brother. No wonder he looked shattered when he read the caller Id.  He had suffered unbelievably because of that incident and the emotions that call would have stirred up must have been overwhelming. So easing her way into such a sensitive subject she asked “how would she know your number?”

Josh shrugged “no idea, through the police force I guess.”

“And how did you know it was her?”

Shrugging again Josh looked away as he admitted “I put their number in my phone when I first got it.”

Grace raised her eyebrows, but didn’t comment. She realised that the only reason Josh would have done that was if he hoped that one day they would make contact. From the one time they spoke about this she got the impression that he didn’t want anything to do with them but maybe that’s not the case. So broaching the main issue with caution, Grace asked “so what do you want to do now?”

Sighing Josh sat back against the couch. He looked over at Grace for a minute and then reaching out pulled her into his arms. Holding her close to his body he said into her hair “I don’t know.”

Technology

Technology. While it is an amazing time saver and can do things we never thought possible, when it doesn't do what it is supposed to, is there anything more frustrating? The day before yesterday, for some reason known only to it, my laptop decided it didn't like me anymore and without warning, stopped working. In the midst of typing a document, it kindly told me it was not going to respond anymore and it wasn't kidding. It wouldn't do anything.

Now if there a more frightening sentence to see at the top of a computer screen then I haven't seen it.  As I looked at the half a dozen or so documents I had open at the time, it filled me with dread. I am the first to admit I don't know much about the working of computers in general but even I know that you shouldn't shut down a computer with things still open because you can lose any unsaved work. So what was I to do? I couldn't close anything because it wasn't responding and the only way I knew to attempt to remedy that was to shut it down and reboot. Disaster.

So to say I was worried would be an understatement. But with no other course of action open to me, I crossed my fingers, closed my eyes and prayed that all would be well as I pushed the button to restart. I don't think I even breathed for the few second it took for it to boot up, then I felt like crying as it seemed my worst fears had been confirmed. Instead of the usual messages indicating it was starting in the normal manner I got a window saying the computer had problems starting and was attempting to repair any problems. AHHHH. This looked worse than losing anything I'd just been working on and hadn't saved. It might mean losing anything I'd done since I last backed up. I hadn't done a back up for five days. AHHHH.

As panic set in and I was struggling to work out what to do, in walked my saviour. He'd know what to do. He could always fix my computer problems. In handing it over to him, I felt better already. However it turned out this problem was even beyond him, and as I began to hyperventilate, I madly tried to retype all I could remember on another computer.

But after a sleepless night, luckily with the light of a new day, came hope, in the guise of an expert. With his advanced knowledge and skill, not to mention a bag of magic discs, he had things back on track within minutes. My computer started up as normal and all my documents were still there, safe and sound. I let out a breath I had been holding since the night before, on a sigh. All was right with the world again. Or so I thought. As the expert went off to rescue someone else, fighting the good fight against the trials of a fickle technology, I was ready to start work again. I settled myself down, laptop on my knee and clicked on a document, itching to pick up where I'd left off, ready to let my imagination have free reign so that my fingers could follow. But what do I get, an error message, AHHHH. I hate computers.

Going Home

Part 6

Hearing the front door open and close Grace got up and walked to the living room door. She was glad Josh was back but she wasn’t sure what to expect and looking at him standing just inside the door she tried to gauge his mood. But unfortunately Josh wasn’t giving much away so she waited.

Josh’s head was still all over the place but just seeing Grace eased the turbulence he felt a bit and looking at her, his expression solemn, he slowly covered the distance between them. He was glad she there and wrapped his arms around her, holding her tight. More than anything he needed something to hang on to. He felt like he was drowning and the warmth of her body next to his gave him solace. Then dropping his head next to her’s he said quietly “sorry.”

Relief flowed though Grace and caused her to hold him just as tightly "don't worry about it’ she said. She was just happy that he wasn’t pushing her away anymore and hoping that meant he was now ready to talk about whatever it was the was going on, Grace moved back. After looking at him for a moment, she grabbed his hand and le him into the living room. On reaching the couch Grace sat down with her legs curled under her. Still holding his hand she pulled Josh down to sit next to her.

Looking at him she could see in his eyes the turmoil he was feeling and asked with concern “are you okay?”

Josh looked down at his hands and nodded but didn’t speak.

Studying his serious expression for a minute she asked “can you tell me what’s going on?”

Leaning forward, resting his elbows on his knees, Josh rubbed his hands over his face. He didn’t know where to start.

As the silence stretched Grace gently prompted him “who was on the phone Josh?”

Then finally looking back into her eyes he replied in a grave tone “my mother.”

Sigh

“Keep an eye out for a parking spot” Nina said to her fifteen year old daughter sitting in the passenger seat, as she tried to watch the traffic streaming all around her and scan the curbs for movement at the same time.
She got no response.

Glancing over Nina sighed and reaching out pulled the nearest headphone cord out of her daughter’s ear.
“Hey” Laura yelled, angry at the interruption to her listening.
 “Watch for a parking spot” Nina repeated with as much patience as she could muster.
“Why” Laura asked “I don’t even want to go.”

Sighing loudly this time, her anger peeking through, Nina said “you’ve made that abundantly clear. Stupid me, I thought you were old enough now to be able to do something for someone else without complaining.”
Laura glared at her mother.
“It’s not going to kill you, you know” Nina said.

“You sure about that? I read on facebook the other day about someone dying of boredom.”
Nina rolled her eyes as she continued scanning the streets for a spot to park, craning her neck to look along the other side of the road “you can’t believe everything you read you know?” she said “particularly if it’s on facebook.”
Laura scowled “how would you know? You don’t even go on it.”
“You sure about that?” she said in a parody of her daughter’s words. And as an indicator went on, on a car in a spot just in front of her, she turned and smiled at her “here we go.”
“Oh yay” Laura said, sarcasm dripping from her words as she put her ear piece back in and turned away to look out the window.
And in what felt like a perpetual expression of late when she was dealing with Laura, Nina sighed and parked the car.