Learning To Trust Again

As her brother ended the call Rebecca hung up the phone and allowed her head to drop back on the couch. Now she was really tired. Arguing with Todd had used up her last reserves of energy. She wished she’d stuck to her original decision not to tell him about what had happened, but it was too late for that now. If she knew him, he’d be around to check on her as soon as he was back in town. She was sure she hadn’t heard the end of it. Closing her eyes for a moment, feeling even more exhausted by just the thought of it, she tried to summon the energy necessary to get up and go to bed. Her hatred for this shift, where she finished so late, increased every time she had to work it. She’d be glad for it to be over tomorrow. The only down side this time was, it would bring an end to her visits from Jake. Lifting her head as she considered this, she felt sad but forcing herself to get up before she fell asleep where she was she turned out the lights and moved into the bedroom. She dragged herself through her bedtime ritual with dogged determination, knowing she’d regret it in the morning if she didn’t. Then with relief, she fell into bed and was asleep almost before her head hit the pillow.

The next night Rebecca spotted Jake as soon as she stepped out through the front doors. He was sitting in the middle of the same seat he had occupied the night before. He looked relaxed with his arms resting along the back of the seat and the ankle of one foot lying on his other knee. She had been full of nervous excitement all day, looking forward to seeing him. Her only worry had been that he would find a reason not to show up. But that hadn’t happened and seeing him sitting there waiting for her, her lungs were suddenly devoid of air. She paused a minute and took a deep breath to replenish her lungs before walking over to him, her steps slow and cautious. Stopping a little behind the seat she said in a tight voice ‘hello Jake.’

Jake turned his head to look at her and stood up. If he was nervous or even just pleased to see her, it didn’t show. He replied ‘hi’ in his deep voice. He didn’t smile but after a second when neither of them spoke he asked ‘busy night?’

Giving him a small smile, Rebecca was pleased it was him who broke the silence for a change, even if his question seemed to stem more from a sense of a formality than a genuine interest in the answer. She said ‘about average, but it seemed like a very long shift today.’ What she didn’t tell him was that it was looking forward to seeing him rather than the work that made the day drag.

Jake seemed to take the statement at face value. He said with feeling ‘I know what you mean.’ But as usual he didn’t explain further.

Disappointed as the conversation once again petered out Rebecca wondered if maybe a change of location might aid communication. Looking up at him, hope increasing her heart rate, she asked ‘do you mind if we make a detour and grab a coffee? I don’t think I’ll be able to sleep just yet.’