Going Home

Part 26

Josh stared at his mother. He wasn’t sure if he was ready for that and didn’t know how to answer.

Margaret, seeing the uncertainty on his face and not wanting to push him and cause a severing of their tenuous connection, offered another option “look think about it okay, but if you decide not to come. We’ll come here. You just tell us when it’s good for you and we’ll be here.” She wanted him to know that she was not giving up on this, if he can’t or won’t come. If need be they would come to him.

Josh nodded. He needed to think about this. Going back to the farm would stir up more memories. “I’ll think about it.”

Margaret smiled “thank you. I’ll call you later in the week and you can let me know what you decide.”

As she finished speaking Margaret noticed a blonde woman in the same uniform as Josh enter the café and move towards them. Taking a closer look at her face Margaret smiled as she recognised Grace. Margaret couldn’t believe how different she looked in her uniform. 

Stopping at their table Grace smiled back at her “hello Margaret.”

“Hello Grace, I almost didn’t recognise you in your uniform.”

“I know it’s amazing the difference it makes, my Mum says the same thing.” Then turning to Josh Grace said with a regretful look “sorry Josh we’ve been called out.”

 Standing he replied “no worries.” Then turning to his mother he said “I’ll get back to you” and pausing for a minute he added his first voluntary communication “have a safe trip home.”

Though small, the significance of this utterance was not lost on Margaret, and she had to fight to hold back the tears. Swallowing hard she replied “thank you Josh I will.” Then turning to Grace said “it’s been lovely to meet you Grace, I hope we’ll meet again soon.”

“Yes, me too Margaret, bye” and Grace led the way out of the café.

Shock

Charlie raced out to the car trying not to let panic take over.  When the phone call had come through from the police she had just thrown on the clothes that had been on the floor, those she had been wearing earlier that day. Or was it yesterday now. She wasn’t sure. Not pausing to find out she tried to control her breathing before she got behind the wheel to drive. The name of the hospital she had been given went round and round in her head as she stopped next to the car. She fumbled with the keys as she attempted to unlock the car door.  After dropping them twice she finally managed to find the right button and released the central locking.  Sighing with relief she opened the door and got in. 

But then she didn’t move. All of a sudden it had struck her that nothing else was moving, nothing has changed. She wound down the window and listened, nothing. Looking around it seemed surreal to her that here, there was hardly a sound to be heard, everything was quiet and peaceful as it should be at this time of night. And yet not far away her husband was being transported to hospital after a serious car accident. How was it possible that such an emergency could be occurring for her and yet everything around her remained undisturbed? It didn’t seem fair. It felt like there should be some acknowledgement from her surroundings that things were not as they should be. Some change to signify that something in the world besides her was affected. But there wasn’t. The world just kept turning, and it gave her a desolate, hollow feeling. It made her realise like she never had before, when it came down to it, just how alone and insignificant people are.  She shivered and fighting back tears, she started the car.

Noises In The Night

This is the last part of this story.

Part 5

Looking towards the hall doorway, waiting for the person to appear Megan was taking bets with herself as to who it was. Tossing up between her other two children she considered it more likely to be her other son, the middle child, who was up, rather than his older sister. Normally she slept so soundly an army could march through her bedroom and she wouldn’t even stir. 

All of a sudden the footsteps stopped. Megan smiled. “You might as well come in Jared. I know you’re there” she joked.

But there was no response and no one entered the room. “Jared?” Megan called out.
Still there was nothing and she noticed that not even the noise seemed to be occurring anymore. Frowning, she stepped forward so she could see who was approaching. But as she stepped in line with the passage and turned her head to look in the direction of the footsteps, her eyes widened and her blood ran cold. She opened her mouth to scream but this time, no noise came out.

Noises In The Night

Part 4

Startled the figure screamed back causing Megan to scream all the more. But after a second as her heart settled back in her chest she recognised with immense relief that it was just her youngest child standing there, her ten year old son Max. 

“Oh Max, you scared the life out of me” she said

“What’s that noise Mum?” Max asked with a yawn as the noise came again.

“I don’t know. I was just checking to see if it was the dryer.”

“Doesn’t sound like the dryer” Max said rubbing his eyes. 

“No, it’s not” Megan said looking back into the laundry with a worried expression. Then turning back to her son she said “go back to bed sweetie, don’t worry about it” and sighed as she heard footsteps in the passage heading their way. She wondered which of her other two children were out of bed now.

Going Home

Part 25

Just after two the next day TR2 pulled back into base. They had finished their last job fifteen minute ago and nothing else had come up so they were back to grab a late lunch.

Grace looked over at Josh “are you going to ring her?”

Josh frowned “I guess so. But I doubt she would have hung around this long.”

Grace smiled she wasn’t fooled by Josh’s attitude she knew he was warming to her. “I think you’ll be surprised.”

Pulling out his phone Josh dialed the number his mother gave him and he is indeed taken aback when his call is answered on the second ring. As he heard her greeting Josh realised she had been waiting for his call. “Hey” Josh said “I’m on a break now.”

“That’s good” Margaret said “Are you back at your base? I’m in a café around the corner. I thought it would be easier if I came to you.”

Once again Josh was surprised, she was going out of her way to show him this was important to her and it was more than he expected. After a pause he said “I’ll be there in a minute.”

Margaret was still feeling nervous about meeting Josh. He was so stern and intimidating that she wasn’t sure what to expect from him. But she knew he did have a softer side. She had seen how he looked at Grace and how he behaved with her, and she wondered if the other woman helped bring out that side of him. Waiting for him to arrive, Margaret wondered if he would ever drop his severe attitude with her, she certainly hoped so. She’d love to see him smile again. She remembered how he was before the accident when his gorgeous smile was often visible. Looking up at the door for what seemed like the hundredth time since he called, Margaret stared in awe as Josh strode into the café. She hadn’t seen him in uniform before and tears loomed as the pride she felt in her son threatens to overwhelm her. She was immensely impressed in the man he had become. Blinking back the tears Margaret looked up into his eyes as Josh stopped by her table. “Hi”

“Hi” Josh said, but he made no move to sit down.

Margaret gathered her courage and said “can you sit down for a minute? I’d like to ask you something.”

Frowning, Josh sat. He wasn’t sure he liked the sound of what was to come.

Fiddling with her napkin in her lap Margaret asked “would you like a coffee?”

Josh just stared at her “I’m fine, but I may get called back at any minute so maybe you should just ask what you want to ask.”

“Oh ok.” Margaret paused and looking down at her hands took a deep breath before tackling the subject that was at the heart of her making contact with him. “I was wondering if you could come home for a visit? Your father would love to see you.” Then looking back into his eyes she added “needs to see you.”

Noises In The Night

Part 3

To Megan’s dismay as soon as she turned on the light in the laundry she knew it hadn’t been the dryer making the noise. The back door was closed and checking the handle she discovered it was locked. But she still wanting the appliance to be the source of the noise, because the alternative was something unknown and therefore more disturbing. So her eyes moved to the power point that the dryer was plugged into. Deep down she knew it was a futile action but she couldn’t help it. However as expected, she saw the appliance was turned off at the wall making it impossible for it to have caused the noise that had woken her. Then removing all doubt, as she stood there, the noise came again. Megan noticed it was much louder on the ground floor and it completely unnerved her. Spinning around to head back upstairs and wake her husband after all, Megan had her hand on the light switch when she discovered she wasn’t alone. Terrified, her heart jumped into her throat as she saw a figure standing only a meter away and a scream escaped her lips.

Letting Go - A mother's letter to her daughter

With a control freak like me, letting go was always going to be a painful business. But what I didn’t foresee was that I wouldn’t recognise the need to when it came down to it. I’m not sure when it was we started to appear as opposing forces, but that seems to be the way it is between us with everything now. And as much as it hurts to relinquish control, what hanging on is doing to us both, hurts even more. So go. I release you, to grow and be joyous and evolve to be everything you can be. Never fear, you will never be alone, I will always be behind you but from here on out, the decisions will be yours. I just hope one day you will look back and think of  the old control freak who ruled your life with kindness and know that nothing was ever done out of malice or a wish to hold you back. But rather my actions were born out a love so big and so powerful I lost control of it and it ended up controlling me.  Be happy.

Noises In The Night

Part 2

Megan’s eyes darted around the landing, checking every shadow as she reached the bottom of the stairs. She was still having to talk herself into taking each step as fear threatened to paralise her. The noise had started again when she was part way down, startling her, but while she paused to listen now, all was quiet again. Without haste, she began moving forward again, turning in the direction of the laundry, switching on more lights as she moved towards the back of the house. Her chest was beginning to hurt, her heart was beating so fast and she could feel a cold sweat forming on her skin, making her shiver. 

Sooner than she would have liked she was standing before the laundry door. She had noticed nothing out of place along the way but it afforded her little relief.  She still had to find an explanation for the noise. Putting her hand out, praying it was just that the dryer had been left on, Megan turned the handle and pushing open the door, she turned on the light.

Rescue Me

This is the last part of this story.

Part 14

Keeping his eyes directed straight ahead he clarified “my girlfriend. In a car accident.”

Kayla gripped his forearm. Pulling to stop him moving, she stared up at him. He didn’t look at her. He couldn’t. He knew what he’d see in her eyes. He kept his eyes fixed on a point in the distance.

But Kayla surprised him. She didn’t speak. Instead she slid the hand that still lay on his forearm, down his sleeve and grasped his hand, her fingers wrapping tightly around his.

Still Jesse didn’t look at her and while he didn’t disengage his hand, he didn’t return the pressure of her fingers either. 

Kayla looked away. 

Sensing her gaze leave him, Jesse finally looked down. Her hand was warm in his and the simple touch gave him some solace, something he hadn’t allowed himself to feel since his world fell apart almost a year ago. He closed his fingers around hers.

Kayla let her breath out on a soft sigh, but she didn’t look up.  

And after a minute she moved to restart the journey home.

Without a word, Jesse followed.  

Going Home

 Part 24

The next morning Grace was busy preparing breakfast as they waited for Margaret to arrive. Distracted, Josh was trying to help but was unable to stand still long enough to complete a task. Finally Grace sent him out of the kitchen to set the table and watched as he went to stand looking out the window with his hands in his pockets. Stopping what she was doing she walked up to him and standing behind him, wrapped her arms around his waist.

Lost in his thoughts Josh didn’t hear Grace approach but looked down at her arms as they wound around him. He could feel the warmth of her body against his back and he absorbed it for a minute before turning around and pulling her close. She had been amazing throughout this whole thing and he wasn’t sure he could have coped without her support. But just as he finished that thought a knock on the door announced his mothers arrival and moving back Josh looked down at Grace for a moment, his expression solemn before going to answer the door.

Over breakfast Margaret tried to find out about her sons life. But conversation was somewhat strained. Josh’s replies were not very informative. He offered no more information than what was asked for and he didn’t initiate any further conversation.

But determined, Margaret persevered. She said “I like your apartment, have you lived here long?”

Looking stern, Josh said “a while.”

Watching the difficult exchange between mother and son Grace decided to step in to help the flow of conversation. “Yes Josh had lived here for a couple of years before we met and I’ve been here about two years now.”

Grateful to Grace for her efforts Margaret smiled at her. “Do you work Grace?”

Grace smiled with sympathy at Margaret. She knew this wasn’t easy for her either “yes that’s how Josh and I met we are in the same squad.”

“Oh you’re a police officer too? Well I’m assuming they are okay about you working together. I thought they would have had rules about that sort of thing?”

Grace grimaced slightly “yeah well they do really but our immediate bosses are okay about it and we make sure we don’t make it obvious at work, or at least we try not to.” Then giving Josh a tender look, Grace continued “but sometimes you just can’t help it.”

Noticing the way Grace looked at her son Margaret smiled. She was more than pleased Josh was obviously in a good relationship.

Grace and Margaret chatted easily throughout the meal and Grace filled in as many gaps as she could. Josh however was mostly silent, only entering the conversation when he was asked a direct question. So later as she prepared to leave Margaret was feeling somewhat dejected. She wanted to ask Josh something but his responses were not encouraging. The question she wanted to ask was one of the reasons she had suggested this meeting, but his attitude didn’t seem very conducive to a positive response so at the last minute she decided to give him some more time. Instead she made a suggestion that she hoped he’d accept. Standing at the door ready to leave she turned to Josh and said “I was wondering if we could meet again tomorrow? I go home in the afternoon and I won’t be able to get back to the city for a fortnight.”

Josh frowned “I have to work tomorrow.”

“Do you get a break?” Margaret asked unable to disguise the hope in her voice.

Looking at Grace who smiled encouragement, then back at his mother, Josh nodded “yeah but it depends on what happens during the day when that will be. I’ll have to ring you and let you know when. But I may not be able to get away at all.”

Margaret smiled. She was happy he didn’t say no and was willing to wait all day if necessary. “That’s fine, I haven’t got anything else to do so I’ll just wait for your call.”

Josh nodded “okay.” Despite his monosyllabic response he can’t help but be impressed by the fact that this was obviously important enough to her that she was willing to wait all day for something that may not even happen. Almost against his will, his attitude towards her was softening, even if he couldn’t show it yet.

Rescue me

Part 13

It was two weeks before Jesse saw Kayla again. He had tried to push her out of his mind, but he couldn’t. He didn’t know why but he needed to see her and each day it became more urgent. Until finally he couldn’t take it anymore and near closing time one night, he strolled into the pharmacy.

Watching him enter, Kayla studied him for a minute, “hi.”

“Hey” he replied his expression neutral.

“Did you need something?”

Pushing his hands into his pockets he said “I’ll walk you home?”

A smile lit up Kayla’s face. She said “that would be lovely Jesse. I’m just about to pack up.”

“Take your time” he said without change of expression and wandered off to inspect some stock on the shelves while he waited. He had come to talk to her, but he couldn’t do it here in the brightly lit shop. 

He could feel her eyes on him often as she packed up for the night and it was making him nervous.

Locking the shutters, Kayla threw her keys in her bag and turning to him said “ready.”

Like the time before, they were silent as they walked along, but this time Kayla didn’t question him.

They had been walking for a couple of minutes when Jesse finally managed to speak. Without preamble he said “she was killed.”

Kayla’s head snapped around, “what?”

Noises In The Night

Megan woke with a start. Disorientated, she lay still trying to work out what had woken her. She looked at the clock, it was one am and as it should be at that time of night, he house was peaceful. Her husband’s heavy breathing next to her was the only sound to be heard. Assuming the cause was a dream she’d been having, Megan relaxed and settled back down to sleep. But within seconds her eyes snapped open as she heard a strange sound coming from somewhere on the floor below her. She knew now this is what had pulled her out of her sleep. 

It wasn’t loud but it was something that definitely shouldn’t have been there.  A whirring noise like a motor running, it stopped as suddenly as it started. Megan was puzzled. There was no reason for anything to be running at that time of night. Everyone in the house was in bed. She frowned, trying to think of possible causes. Maybe it was coming from the house next door. But as the noise started up again she could tell it was closer than that. Maybe she had left the dryer running. She had done that before and she knew if that was the case, the backdoor would be open too. She always opened it if she was running the dryer so condensation didn’t build up in the laundry. The trouble is, she didn’t remember having the dryer on. Her frown deepened. 

She turned on the light and waited hoping whatever it was had stopped. But within a few minutes it came again. Looking over at her slumbering husband she contemplated waking him, but then decided against it. He would only get mad and she would be left feeling stupid when he no doubt would find it was her fault for forgetting to turn off the dryer. It wasn’t as if the noise sounded menacing or anything, it was just annoying because she didn’t know what it was. 

So pushing aside the covers Megan sat up. She wouldn’t be able to go back to sleep, thinking the back door was open, so she would have a look downstairs herself. Never a particularly courageous person, she took a deep breath as she opened the bedroom door. The house was in darkness. Turning on the lights as she went, she made her way to the staircase, telling herself with every step that she had nothing to worry about. But with all the scenes out of every horror movie she’d ever seen playing through her head, when everyone screams “don’t go out there” her heart was hammering as she started down the stairs.

Pride doesn't always come before a fall

As a parent, there are moments when your kids drive you crazy, but if you are lucky these are outnumbered by the moments when they fill you with pride. Saturday night was one of the latter for us when our eldest daughter took part in her presentation ball.  As could have been expected she looked beautiful, not unlike all those that took part, but what impressed me more, was the grace and confidence with which she conducted herself. I could not have asked for a more charming and respectful display. She had eleven guests there to experience her big night and she made sure each one of them knew she appreciated their attendance. In a world where rude, crass and disrespectful behaviour is increasingly the norm, a night of elegance and deference made for a delightful change. Well done beautiful girl, you made us very proud.

Going Home

Part 23

Smiling Josh nodded “sounds good” and turned on to his stomach with his arms above his head.

Getting on to her knees Grace straddled Josh’s body and sitting lightly on his lower back. Starting on his shoulders she began to massage. She could feel the tension in his muscles. But as she worked her way down his back Grace began to get distracted by the feel of his toned body beneath her hands and her touch became more caressing than massaging.

Josh who had been enjoying the massage, starting to relax at last, noticed the change in Graces touch and became a bit distracted himself. As a different sort of tension coiled its way through his body Josh stirred and moving Grace’s weight enough to turn over settled back down with her now sitting on his stomach. Feigning annoyance he placed his hands on her thighs and frowned up at her. “You call that a massage?”

Smiling she rubbed her hands over his chest “well that’s how it started but…” and leaving the sentence unfinished she eased herself back as her hands moved lower.

Groaning Josh grabbed her arms and pulled her down on top of him. And his arms wrapped around her, the events of the day were forgotten for awhile.