Learning To Trust Again

The journey to Rebecca’s was as usual conducted in silence. Jake wanted to touch her but he didn’t want to risk scaring her off, not now. He kept his hands in his pockets as they walked so he won’t be tempted. When they walked past the pub he was reminded of the night they had first met. It seemed like years ago. He looked over at Rebecca wondering if she was thinking the same thing. But her expression told him nothing. He turned back to face forward.

For once Rebecca had been happy not to talk as they walked. She didn’t want to get into what they had to discuss until they could do it without distractions. Letting them into her apartment she dropped her bag on the coffee table and took a seat on the couch. All of a sudden she felt very weary. She still hadn’t caught up on the sleep she’d lost in the last few days. After speaking to Jake last night, she had once again had a disturbed night.

Sitting down next to her but not touching her Jake said ‘do you want to start?’

Nodding she said ‘I think I need to explain something, but it’s difficult for me to talk about.’

Reaching out, Jake picked up her hand. He rubbed his thumb over the back of hand ‘take your time’ he said.

Looking away from him, but appreciating the contact, Rebecca didn’t pull her hand away. She swallowed hard and began. ‘Before I moved here I was in a relationship with a guy named Mark. I met him when I was nineteen. He was twenty five and we were together for about five years.’ Her voice was barely more than a whisper as she continued, fighting to get the words out ‘it wasn’t a healthy relationship, at least it wasn’t for me, not that I saw that at the time. For him it was probably as good as it got. Although I didn’t know it until the end, he had lied to me about everything. From the first moment we met until I finally saw him for what he was, it was all a lie. He stole from me and used me and as naïve as I was, I believed everything he said without question. I wouldn’t listen to anyone when they tried to tell me what he was like. I was in love with him and absolutely blind to everything he was doing. It took him wiping out my bank account, selling my car without my knowledge and when I went to ask him about it, finding him in bed with someone else, for it to finally hit home.’

Silent for a minute, tears started to run down her face. Her voice was broken and raw as she added, ‘he laughed at me. When I went to his place to confront him, and found him in bed with a woman who had pretended to be my friend, he laughed. He told me he had never loved me and that I was the easiest person to play he’d ever come across. He said he couldn’t believe how simple it was to get me to forgive him, no matter what he did and the only reason he wasn’t going to bother this time was because I had nothing left for him to take. I was stupid.’

Learning To Trust Again

‘If you were given the chance’ Rebecca said, choosing her words with care ‘it couldn’t.’

Eyes intent and steady on hers he said ‘If I was given the chance I promise you, you would only ever get the truth from me, no exceptions.’

Staring into his steady green gaze Rebecca finally nodded, but she didn’t speak again.

In the same quiet voice, Jake said ‘thank you for defending me.’

Shrugging Rebecca looked away. ‘I knew you wouldn’t make something like that up. I knew you weren’t capable of that kind of lie.’

‘Thank you’ he said again and after a second he added ‘I’m sorry.’

Rebecca knew he was referring to what had happened after Todd’s party rather than anything current and without looking at him she said ‘what are you doing now?’

Hope in his voice, Jake said ‘nothing, I was just heading home.’

Rebecca raised her eyes, ‘do you want to come back to my place? I think we need to talk.’

Nodding, Jake replied in the same serious tone ‘I’d like that. Did you walk over?’

‘Yes’ Rebecca said ‘you?’

‘Yep’ he said ‘I’m on foot too.’

Rebecca felt a little awkward and looked away ‘okay.’ Then not knowing what to say she took a step and then another and they started walking down the corridor. Jake fell into step beside her and they made their way out of the hospital.

Learning To Trust Again

Jake had to run to catch up with Rebecca, her indignation and anger causing her to move fast. Putting his hand on her arm as she strode along, he immediately withdrew it as she stiffened and stopped. She didn’t look at him.

‘Are you okay?’ he asked, his voice soft.

Shrugging and fighting to hold back tears, her voice was harsh as she said without looking at him ‘what do you think?’

‘Don’t worry about Todd, he’ll calm down’ Jake said. ‘I can understand why he doesn’t want to believe it.’

Turning to look at him, her expression incredulous, she asked ‘you can understand it?’ and as her anger rose again she added ‘good for you, maybe you’ll be so good as to explain it to me, because I don’t bloody get it at all and what about Dad telling us to leave like we’d done something wrong?’ She threw her hands in the air and looked away ‘What the hell was that?’

Shrugging, his voice calm, Jake said ‘well as far as Todd is concerned, he liked Jemma, he trusted her. Would you want to believe someone you liked could do that to you?’ He paused and watched her.

Rebecca looked at him, frowning. She knew he was deliberately drawing a comparison for her between what he’d done and what Jemma had done. But why? Why would he do that when he knew how she felt about it? And as she searched his eyes it hit her. He was showing her that he now knew he’d done the wrong thing. She just continued to look at him, waiting.

 In a quiet voice he added, ‘as for your father, what choice did he have? Todd was upset, and he’s still recovering. It was better for him that we left. Your father was just trying to do what was right for him.’

Still searching his expression Rebecca remained silent for a long minute. She’d heard what he said about her father but that wasn’t what was important to her just then so she ignored it. Instead she said ‘you understand it was a betrayal, that lying hurts and destroys trust.’

She was not talking about Todd and Jemma anymore and he knew it. Jake nodded. His eyes were fixed on hers as he said ‘I know, I should have told you and if I were given the chance to do it again, that’s what I’d do. If I were given the chance to start over, it wouldn’t happen again.’

Learning To Trust Again

Deep down she knew Jake wasn’t anything like Mark. As her mother had said, he was a good man who’d made a mistake, but he didn’t lie to hurt her. However after finally seeing Mark for what he was she’d made a promise to herself not accept that sort of disrespect or excuse it from anyone. She couldn’t forgive Jake and keep that promise. So she’d built up walls to keep him out. But when Todd accused Jake of lying out of spite or for personal gain, she couldn’t continue. His unjustified accusations had forced her to make a stand and recognise what was really important. She couldn’t just let her brother’s lie stand without saying something or she’d be guilty of the same thing, because she knew Jake wasn’t like that.

‘Jake wouldn’t do that’ she muttered.

But Todd wasn’t finished and as Rebecca tried to sort through her thoughts he continued with his attack.  ‘Shut up’ he said.

This brought Rebecca’s head up and as she looked at her little brother, he glared back at her, his features already distorted from the beating, appeared now to be that of a stranger.

 He roared ‘you can get out too and if you continue to stick up for him’ giving Jake a scathing look before turning his gaze back on her he added ‘don’t bother coming back.’

‘Todd, you don’t mean that’ Rebecca said nearly in tears at the unfairness of his attack. Turning as she heard her parents return she said to her father ‘Dad, please speak to him. He thinks Jake arrested Jemma for no reason. He won’t listen to us.’

‘You arrested Jemma?’ Brian asked in surprise looking at Jake.

Jake nodded.

But before explanations could be made Todd sat up and screamed ‘no.’

Then grabbing his ribs as his injuries made themselves known he added through clenched teeth ‘I don’t want to hear anymore about it and if you are just going to keep repeating those ridiculous accusations then you can all get out, got it?’ Lowering himself back down to the bed Todd closed his eyes and grimaced as a searing pain travelled across his rib cage.

‘Okay son, take it easy’ Brian replied putting a calming hand on his shoulder, trying to appease him.

Brenda walked over to the other side of her son’s bed, worried at how worked up he was about this. She looked at Brian ‘I think we need to discuss this later.’

 Brian nodded and turned to their daughter. With pain in his eyes he said ‘maybe you and Jake should just go honey, this isn’t doing Todd any good. He needs rest so he can heal. We’ll sort this out later.’

But as Rebecca just stared at her father, her eyes wide in disbelief and making no attempt to move. He gave her a pleading look and said ‘please Becs, just go. I’ll call you later.’

Shaking her head and glaring at her father and then her mother who returned her look with a silent plea for understanding, Rebecca spun around and walked out without another word. Looking at Rebecca’s parents with sympathy for a minute, Jake said ‘don’t worry, I’ll talk to her’ and followed her out.

Going Home

Part 108

On the bank out of ear shot of the boat Robert cast his line and glancing at Josh said with a smile “well some things haven’t changed. I still can’t leave you alone with a girl.”

Looking over at his father Josh burst out laughing and after a minute he said “what can I tell you Dad, I just can’t help myself where she’s concerned.”

Laughing now too Robert looked back at the water “well at least you’ve got good taste, Grace is a lovely girl.”

“Yeah she’s amazing” Josh agreed talking more to him self than to Robert. Then frowning he looked back at his father and said in a serious tone “but don’t say anything to her about this. She didn’t take it well that you guys came back earlier than expected.”

Robert looked at him “no problem Josh, your Mother guessed she’d probably be embarrassed. Not that she has any need to be, you guys are adults after all and it didn’t bother us. But I can see it would make her uncomfortable so don’t worry we won’t say anything.”

Looking appreciatively at his father Josh nodded “thanks.”

Then as they looked at each other both men began to laugh again.