Loss and Longing

Stevie gave herself up to the sensations the touch of his mouth was creating and as his arms closed around her, and her hands came up to rest on his chest, she relaxed against him.

Sometime later, Stevie had no idea how long, maybe minutes, maybe hours, Grant lifted his head and looked down at her. His face creased into a smile. “Sorry just needed to check I hadn’t imagined it.”

Stevie smiled and then she laughed. “No problem” she said “but now we’ve got the first course out of the way, I’d better get started on the main one.”

“If that was the first course, this may have to be a ten course dinner” he teased.

Stevie laughed again and moving behind the island bench, into the main kitchen space she rubbed her hands together and said “okay tell me where everything is.”

She worked with efficiency and competence and even refusing all Grant’s offers of help she had their main meal on the table and dessert in the oven within thirty minutes. Carrying the plates over to the table that Grant had set, she sat down opposite him.

“You’ve done that before” Grant said as he cut into the perfectly cooked steak.

“Once or twice” Stevie said, smiling.

“At home?”

“Yes, I’m often home before Mum so I cook for everyone three or four times a week.”

“Who’s everyone?” he asked.

“Mum, my brother Dean and my sister Catherine.”

“You’re the eldest?”

“Yes” she said. My brother ‘s sixteen and my sister, fourteen.

“What about your father?” Grant asked.

Stevie looked away “He died five years ago.

Grant looked over at her, “I’m sorry” he said.

She shrugged but didn’t meet his eyes, “thanks” she said.

After a minute he said “my father’s dead too and my mother, car accident.”

Stevie reached out and squeezed his hand. His eyes were on his plate. After a second she asked “do you have any brothers or sisters?”

“No” he said disengaging his hand, “not anymore.”

“Oh” she said and knew better than to ask anything else. She could see his pain was still raw and remembered only too well what that was like.

After a minute he looked over at her and said “sorry.”

“Don’t be” she said. “I understand.”

He nodded and they ate in silence for a while.

“Can I ask you a question?” he said as he pushed his now empty plate aside.

“Okay.”

“Why didn’t you want to go out tonight?”

Learning To Trust Again

Jake was silent for a minute and he looked away. He didn’t like the idea of Todd not getting a medical clearance and he liked keeping it from Rebecca even less. But then again he couldn’t help but worry that telling her might put her in harm’s way. If that happened, he’d never forgive himself. If her brother was in some sort of trouble, and it looked like he was, he didn’t want to put her in the middle of it. From Todd’s evasive behaviour and the fact that he wasn’t pushing for the person who had beaten him to be found, Jake was pretty sure Todd knew who was responsible. If that was the case, it’s unlikely it was a random event which meant Todd may still be in danger. No, Jake would like to know more about what was going on before he told her anything. However it was clear Todd didn’t want to tell him, so the only way he could see to get the information was to make it a condition of his help.

‘Can you help me get cleaned up?’ Todd asked again.

 Jake’s eyes moved back to him. Looking at him in silence for a minute he finally agreed. But as he nodded to indicate this he added in an uncompromising tone ‘okay but later you tell me what’s going on, right?’

Todd sighed and thought for a minute. As he expected, Jake wasn’t going to let this go, but at the moment it was more important he get back to his party without anyone knowing what had gone on. To do that, as much as he hated it, he needed Jake’s help. So unable to see any way out of agreeing to his condition, he nodded ‘okay, but not tonight.’

Jake was okay with that. He didn’t want to get into it with Rebecca there anyway. ‘Tomorrow morning’ he said, not prepared to give him an indefinite time line.

Todd nodded again. He’d have to find a way out of telling him later, or come up with some inconsequential lie. But for now he had no option but to agree to whatever terms the other man set. To say he had been surprised to hear from Rebecca that she was bringing Jake to his party was an understatement. He had thought, after the other man had turned up at her door when he was there, that she wasn’t going to see him anymore, at least that’s what she had said. There was no doubting it was what he’d hoped. He never liked the way Jake had worked his way into her life. Whether he was a cop or not, it didn’t seem right, he’d taken advantage of the unfortunate situation Rebecca had found herself in to push his way in. And as a consequence of that, here he was now forcing his way into Todd’s life as well. Todd resented the hell out of that.

Learning To Trust Again

‘Jake?’ Todd said, knowing he probably sounded as disorientated as he felt. Where the hell was he anyway and who on earth was Jake? Had he been drinking and blacked out but as this last question moved through his brain so did memories of those few painful minutes in the dark lane. Damn, now he remembered. Taking stock he tried to work put what the damage was. His throat felt raw and he couldn’t seem to get his voice above a rough whisper. His eyes didn’t seem to want to open either. As for the rest of him he was not game to straighten out for the moment, his body felt like it had been reduced to pulp from head to toe. Lifting his hands to examine the damage to his head that had started to pound, Todd’s arms seemed as if they were made out of lead.

‘Who did this?’ Jake asked.

Damn, Todd thought, as his brain finally connected the dots about who the man that was squatting in front of him was. Rebecca’s would be boyfriend and worse still a cop. Bloody hell! That was exactly what he didn’t need. Trying to sit up Todd attempted to extricate himself from the situation without explaining. He did not want to tell Jake what had happened, he didn’t want to tell anyone but particularly not a cop. ‘Can we do this later?’ he said with a groan as his injuries made themselves known. His first instinct about not moving had been the correct one. Trouble was he had no time to just lie there until he felt better so gritting his teeth he tried again to move and said ‘I need to get back inside before Mum and Dad begin to wonder what’s going on.’

Holding him down, knowing it was important he didn’t move until he was checked out Jake said ‘they’re going to know something is up as soon as they see you.’ Pulling out his phone he added ‘we need to get an ambulance and get you to hospital.’

 Todd groaned again, he could see Jake wasn’t going to let this slide. Cursing his rotten luck, he pushed the older man’s restraining hand away and finally managed to struggle into an upright position. Putting out his hand to stop Jake from dialing he held his head with the other hand. ‘No, I don’t want my family to know about this.’ 

‘Todd you need to go to hospital and get your injuries looked at’ Jake said ‘not to mention report this.’

‘No I can’t, not tonight. I can’t do this here.’ He wasn’t going to say anything to Jake but it was really Jemma, the girl he was seeing, not his family, that he was worried about. If he left her here alone he’d lose her. He knew some other guy would be sure to try his luck with her. She was gorgeous and now he had finally got her to agree to go out with him, after weeks of trying to convince her, there was no way he was going to risk that happening. Not to mention what she’d think of him if he had to go to hospital for this. It was embarrassing enough that he’d let the guy had get the jump on him. He’d look like a total loser, if on top of that, he had to leave his own party in the back of an ambulance. She would walk away for sure. No, instead of letting the bastard win, he’d use the situation to his own advantage. He could handle this without medical intervention, he wasn’t that badly hurt and in the process, Jemma would see exactly what he was made of. ‘Just help me get back to the party, I’ll be fine.’

Going Home

Part 100

As they continue to cast their lines Robert once again glanced over at Josh. He wanted them to be able to talk but Josh still seemed a bit guarded and sighing Robert found he couldn’t really blame him. After fourteen years of neglect he knew he shouldn’t expect everything to change straight away but that didn’t stop him wanting it to. He’d like to know things about his son and after a few more minutes of silence he eased into a conversation “so how’s the ute running?”

Looking over at his father Josh said “great but I haven’t been able to drive it much. It drove beautifully it up here though.”

Frowning Robert said “don’t you drive it to work?”

“Nah Grace and I walk to work. It’s not worth getting the car out for that distance and it’s good exercise.”

“I guess you need to be pretty fit for your job.”

“Yeah, we’ve got to be prepared for anything. You never know what you’re going to have to do.”

Silent as he considered Josh’s life Robert accepted that he would probably have left the farm even if events hadn’t pushed him away. Farm life couldn’t compare to the excitement of the work he did now and if he was honest he’d always known it was going to be Gavin who would be the one to work on the farm. Saddened Robert looked out over the water.

As the silence stretched Josh looked over at his father and frowned as he noticed his expression. Not sure what he’d said to cause him to look so grim Josh said with caution, “you okay?”

Touched by Josh’s concern Robert smiled as he looked at him “yes Josh I’m fine. Just thinking.”

Not sure he wanted to know but at the same time needing to, Josh said “what about?”

“Oh just the farm, and you. Tell me something do you think you would have stayed on the farm if things had been different?”

Looking away, back over the water, Josh considered this for a minute then said “probably not. Don’t get me wrong I loved living in the country but I don’t think I’d have stayed indefinitely.”

Robert nodded “yeah that’s what I thought.”

“Gavin would have though.” Josh added in a quiet voice, looking down at his hands.

Studying his profile Robert agreed “yes, maybe.” But not wanting Josh to feel more guilt than he already did he added with a smile “but more likely he’d have joined some band and gone to the city with dreams of a record deal.”

Realising his father was trying to lighten the mood, Josh followed his lead and smiled as he acknowledged the old joke about Gavin’s musical dreams. Normally very level headed, Gavin’s one point of madness was his dream about joining a band and becoming a star. And turning his head and looking at his father Josh said “yeah, probably.”

Smiling at his son for a moment, Robert was happy they’d managed to talk about Gavin without getting absorbed by their grief. It seems to him a good sign.

Learning To Trust Again

He didn’t know what he was facing but his specialised training assured that his mind and body were on the alert as he started down the lane scanning the area as he went. Pausing about half way, he let his eyes adjust to the darker area further in before going too far.

After a few more steps he heard the noise again, much closer now and following the direction of the sound with his eyes, he saw a dark indistinct shape on the ground move a little. The person was lying not far in front of him. He moved closer and saw that they were rolled up into a ball, head and limbs curled in towards the torso in a protective position. He could only see their back as they were lying on their side facing away from him but he was pretty sure they were male. Still being cautious, scanning the surrounding area and the lane beyond the person, before he moved any further forward, making sure if this guy was the victim of an attack, whoever did it, wasn’t still in the area. He couldn’t see anything amiss.

Jake squatted and put his hand on the man’s shoulder. He asked ‘you okay mate?’ The prone figure just let out another moan in response and curled tighter. But Jake needed to see how badly hurt they were, so with care, he turned him over, moving him towards him, so he can get a look at him and see the extent of any injuries. However as he pulled the person onto their back a silver dog tag type necklace that Jake was sure he’d seen before slid into view on the persons chest and glinted in the light coming from the street. Looking at it he knew he had watched Rebecca give that to her brother only a few hours before.

‘Todd!’ Jake said shocked as he took in the younger man’s disheveled appearance and the dark marks on his face that he knew without having to wait for stronger light to tell him, were blood. His shirt had been pushed up under his arms, the skin of his abdomen glowing in the dim light ‘what the hell happened?’

Todd moaned again and curled back into a ball as if protecting his battered body.

‘Todd’ Jake said again ‘It’s Jake, can you hear me?’