Loss and Longing

­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­Stevie had loved curling up next to Grant in the dark that night and had wanted to savour it. But with his arms wrapped around her, making her feel more safe and protected than she had felt since she was a kid, when she used to crawl into her parents bed after a bad dream, she had dropped off to sleep before she knew it. However in the early hours of the morning she started awake. At first she wasn’t sure what had woken her but as she sat up and listened she felt movement coming from the man in the bed next to her. Reaching over she turned on the bedside light and looked at Grant. He was tossing and turning and as she watched for a minute she heard him mutter a name, Leah.  Her chest tightened. She didn’t know who Leah was but the fact that he was dreaming about her, worried her.

Moving onto her knees she reached out and shook him awake. He started and said “what? ” before his eyes opened.

As his lids lifted and he looked at her, she said “you were dreaming.” Then unable to leave it unspoken between them, needing to know for her own peace of mind, with a worried expression she added “about someone named Leah.”

Grant rubbed his hands over his head “damn” he said. Pushing the sheet aside he sat up and lowered his legs over the side of the bed.

Stevie didn’t move and when he didn’t speak she said “please Grant who is Leah?”

Grant rested his elbows on his thighs and lowered his chin onto his hands, but he didn’t speak.

And when Stevie had just about given up on him speaking he did but what he said didn’t make any sense. He said “not is.”

Stevie frowned “sorry?”

“Not is” he said again “was. She was my sister.”